"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Randomize
