K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
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