She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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