sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
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