So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
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