On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Randomize
