You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
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