You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
he's gonorrhea incarnate
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
