Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
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