i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Randomize
