I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
