The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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