My friends, they love my intelligence
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
Let's get the cat blown out
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Randomize
