don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
