Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
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