Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
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