perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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