she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
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