as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
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