Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
