oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Do I have a sign around my neck that says "SWM desperately seeking ultra-plus-size woman that likes everything I do"? I swear they're organized
No, but you do have a sign around your neck that says "Free cupcakes."
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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