We're facebook friends in real life
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
