whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
