White coat. Heels.
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
