kristin has been a bad kristin
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
