Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
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