Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
