There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Randomize