I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
Randomize
