I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
Randomize
