I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
Randomize
