She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
Randomize
