is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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