you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Life without a bra equals bliss.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
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