I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Randomize
