she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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