Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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