I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
