Hey man sorry I got all grabby
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
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