i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Randomize
