fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize
