what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Randomize