Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
