i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
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