everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
Randomize
