im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
Randomize
