so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
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