It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
