I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
