idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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