No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
